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23 February 2007

Dude Camp, Day Four

Today was what is called in cycling terms, "Sucking Shit." Sucking Shit is a phenomenon that occurs when one's legs refuse to turn over and one's feet feel as though they are covered with wet towels and cement. It's an unfortunate occurrence. It is especially unfortunate when the people you are riding with say things like, "God, I feel great today!" and "I am ready to Hammer." Hammering is the exact opposite of Sucking Shit. When you are Sucking Shit, you should eat Doritos and drink Coke and you should take pictures of people while they are Hammering.

Here is an example of dudes Hammering into the wind. It was a really strong wind. The wind must've been pissed about something. I was in the car. Being in the car did not suck.

Then it rained. Raining while bike riding is called Massive Double Sucking. It is a horrible phenomenon and you don't want to experience it. When it rains and the temperature drops to 45 degrees, that's a phenomenon called "Chicago."
Here's what the dudes are saying in this picture:
"Hmmm. Sitting still sucks."
"Yeah. Sitting still in the rain really sucks."
"Yeah. Hey--did anyone see Kim's new cassette?"
"Yeah. It's awesome. That whole bike is awesome."

The dudes are smart.