OMG! Like, totally. It’s 2009. I know this because I keep writing the year incorrectly and everyone keeps telling me, “It’s not 2008.” Since I know time moves forward, I’m guessing it’s 2009. I could be wrong, though. Perhaps time moves in any direction it damn well wants. Which would explain why I’m constantly feeling like the protagonist in an episode of “The Twilight Zone.”
Speaking of, remember that episode where the dude is a total book geek and the whole world disappears except him and all kinds of books and then his glasses fall of his face and he steps on them? That sucked.
Anyway, as we do every year, although we didn’t do it last year for some reason, I suspect a government conspiracy, we here at Power Love HQ like to open our mailbag of tricks and answer reader mail. And boy, do we get mail! It’s astronomical the amount of mail we get.
Did I kill your blog?
(from the comments section)
Like overzealous faith or a Doritos habit, Power Love can never be killed. Also, yes, we can go shopping. Also, what are you doing reading a dumb blog when you should be training?
Team Power Love
Can I have a red tricycle for Christmas?
Dear Team Power Love,
If one were to take an empty mayonnaise jar, bury it three feet in red earth, wait 10 days, then unearth it, what treasures would one behold?
A. Hippy Madness
Stop following me.
alfred e newman
OK. There you go. In addition, there were excellent festivities on the New Year’s Eve night, specifically of the 2nd Story sort, which are always giant hooplas. However, because I promised myself I would “live in the moment,” I did not take any pictures and therefore, have no stories to tell. As you know, Alert Power Love Reader, you are nothing if it’s not documented in some sort of imageric form. In addition, I’m lucky I survived the night still in possession of my glasses.
Resolutions for the new year:
1. Decide on a life soundtrack
2. Hire band to play life soundtrack
3. Hire band to follow you around all day everyday while playing life soundtrack
4. Tell band it’s in their best interest to let me name them and then spend the year coming up with hysterical puns that no one laughs at/gets
5. Remind yourself you are a genius; ignore melting frontal lobe
What are your resolutions?
Really? Are you serious?